Our Beautiful Little Brigham

I think I need to try to express my feelings "on paper". I have had the thought to do this all morning but have pushed it aside. Since I cannot seem to concentrate or get anything of consequence accomplished today, it may be because I need to do this post. We have known now for over two years that our beautiful little grandson, Brigham, (Julie and Stanton's third child) would need to have a very major surgery to correct an extremely rare congenital heart defect called Congenitally Corrected Transposition of the Great Arteries. In very simplified terms, his heart works, but it runs completely backwards. The small right ventricle is doing the work that the large left ventricle should be doing, that of circulating the oxygenated blood to all parts of the body. Because the large left ventricle is doing the work of the right ventricle, that of circulating the unoxegenated blood to the lungs, it is not working hard enough to keep it from eventual atrophy. Two years ago last February he had heart surgery at Primary Children's Hospital in Salt Lake City under the capable hands of Dr. Hawkins at which time they placed a band on his pulmonary artery to increase the pressure in his left ventricle. In Julie's words, the PA band serves as a resistance so that the left ventricle can get thicker and stronger and able to work properly when they actually do the Double Switch operation. Since that surgery, they have had several appointments at PCMC to monitor the left ventricle and determine its readiness. Yesterday's tests indicate that sometime in the next three months would be the optimal time. They were also told the very sad news that Dr. Hawkins has advanced pancreatic cancer and has, therefore, retired to spend his remaining few months with his family...such a very sad thing as he is only in his early 50's and is such a capable heart surgeon...the one who would have done Brigham's surgery. This is such a shock and a loss for PCMC. He is so loved and respected there. We are all so sad for Dr. Hawkins and his family and hospital family. Anyway, as a result of all this, it now appears that Brigham will have the surgery at Boston's Children's Hospital. Actually hearing the words that the surgery is imminent created so much more emotion in me than even anticipated. Our little Brigs is so precious to us all, not a baby anymore, but an adorable, communicating little boy with dark auburn hair, very dark, beautiful expressive eyes, a sense of humor, and a hold on our hearts that won't let go! Oh, how we love this little boy! From the minute I laid eyes on him, I knew there was something very special about him...I didn't know, however, that part of his "specialness" was a serious heart problem. I do not know what to say except that Greg and I absolutely know we are all children of a wise, all-knowing Heavenly Father and that there is purpose in all things. The scripture that immediately went through my mind upon hearing the news, and has continued to stay with me today is the wisdom of Nephi in 1 Nephi 11:17 where he answers the angel's question "Knowest thou the condescension of God?" with these words: "I know that He loveth His children: nevertheless, I do not know the meaning of all things." Though we do not understand all this, we, too, know Heavenly Father loves his children. We know He loves our little Brigham, Julie and Stanton, Chloe, Lily, and Cannon. We know he is acutely aware of this challenge in their lives. We also know we have a Savior who atoned not only for our sins, but for our pains, afflictions, and infirmities, including a precious little boy's "broken heart". With this knowledge, we place him in the Savior's loving arms. We love you, our beautiful little Brigham!